Perverse or sensual? A few words about being sexy

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I’ve noticed that girls who are just starting their adventure with dancing in nightclubs often strive to be the best. And actually it’s good, because in this industry ambitions and an expectation bar set high are the basis.

But many of the girls are convinced that in order to achieve perfection, they have to get into the most skimpy and provocative outfit they are able to find and to make a prominent show. From my own experience I know that nothing could be more wrong! You have to know that the best paid dancers in the world realize the border between being vulgar and being sexy. Because the difference is huge.

Be yourself and attract their eyes

Clothes are one of the most important elements of the dancer’s work. You can play the role, feel confident. When I started traveling, going to clubs, gathering experience for the Kate’s Diary Agency, I looked exactly like other girls. At that time, it seemed to me that the more body I show, the better. Because that’s what it’s all about, that’s why men come to the clubs, right? Earlier I did not know this industry very well, I had only my own idea of how it all looks like from the inside.

However, as the time passed by, I got to know this specific world better and I realized that in order to feel really sexy, I need to keep in harmony with myself. Through makeup and a costume, you can get “this thing” out of yourself, stand out, show a flash in your eye. Your strength is your authentic sex appeal, if you feel good in your own skin and outfit, you don’t have to pretend.

When I set off on my next journey, I was better prepared. I changed the style of my work wardrobe completely. I didn’t want to look like a typical club dancer anymore. A black, close fitting knee-length dress that I wore for the first night I could as well wear to go for a party. I saw eyes stopping on my bare shoulders. I attracted attention and at the same time remained unreachable. I have never received as many compliments as before. It was amazing. But the most important thing for me was that I showed my class and elegance and I felt comfortable with it. And I think other people sensed it. My confidence has won.

Don’t reveal all cards at once

There is a thin line between being sexy and vulgar. Of course, everyone perceives it a different way. To my mind, being sexy is to have an intelligent sense of humor, distance to myself and the world, a sincere smile, and a positive attitude. If you asked me what makes female sex appeal for me, so purely visual, I would answer: it would be details – subtle makeup, well-groomed nails, delicately highlighted curves, exposed legs, unruly strands of hair…

When choosing an outfit, I bet on understatement. Flimsy dresses, discreet translucency… Remember that nudity does not leave any space for imagination. Also watch out for “sparkles”. Many clubs have the principle of preventing greasy oils and glitter, also known as ‘stripper dust’. Are you curious why? It is said: “leave your mark in his mind, not on his clothing”.

You have it all inside

I will tell you a little secret. A real sex appeal has nothing to do with the outside appearance. Do you know what’s sexy? Being able to talk to everyone. Making him feel special in your company. To be able to surprise someone with your knowledge, good behavior, a clever comment or a witty savory joke. Keep class. By doing so you can express your individuality and character. It seduces without a pinch of provocation.

Every time I think I’ve already seen everything, something proves me that I was wrong. That is why this industry will never cease to fascinate me. It drives me to act and develop.

Katarzyna Hajduk :*

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